A List of Firsts

I never thought I'd live to see myself transform into a mommy. I know our journey has only just begun but these past two weeks and four days have brought more joy to me that I have ever felt in my entire life, combined.

I will never forget the first time I heard you cry. It was a very soft cry as soon as you got out, followed by another sot cry and followed by another loud, continuous cry as they were cleaning you off right before I dozed off completely. That moment, I knew that I will do anything and everything for you.

I will never forget the first time I saw you in person. I saw you through a glass viewing window while you were in the incubator in the NICU. I remember how I desperately wanted to come to you and hold you in my arms.

I will never forget the first time you heard my voice. It was as if you heard a very familiar voice and you started moving your tiny body, as if searching for the source of that sound and listening to every word I was saying. 

I will never forget the first time I touched you. I gently stroke your soft little fingers as you held my finger and would not let go. I stayed until you fell asleep that day.

I will never forget my first Mother's Day celebration in May 10, 2015. Thank you for making me your mom. I could only see you through the incubator and I can only touch you instead of holding you in my arms but just to be able to look at you is more than enough for me.

I will never forget the first time I saw you open your eyes. It was as if you were looking for the voice singing your favorite nursery rhymes while you were still in my womb. I looked at your eyes and you looked at mine. I know it will still be a while before you really see me though.
   
I will never forget the first time I held you in my arms. My heart was pounding so fast but I quickly got used to holding your tiny body next to mine. Until now, whenever I would hold you, you quickly fall soundly asleep.

I will never forget the first time I breastfed you. I could just stare at you all day and not notice time passing.

I will never forget the first time I saw you pout your tiny lips. Your were so so so cute. I also remember thinking that your Papa and I are in so much trouble because you will surely have us both under your control. Of course, we will pretend it isn't so.

As I said, I know that our journey had only began. And I'm sure it will be one heck of an adventure. We are new to this but we will get better as we get to know you and you get to know us. Although life is full of surprises and uncertainties, I know one thing is for sure. That we will always love you will all of our hearts and we will always be by your side through this whole ride called life.